This week is full ahead in Sagittarius Season! We are all about living out our life purpose and Faith as a full time Job! This is a very important subject that I have been working through as well. And what I am learning as a student of life and the Divine is that we, more so I, have to STOP over complicating things and learn how to be more aligned with purposed living. Because the truth is success, life purpose, or whatever we are striving to achieve is quite simple and very seamless.
I can remember wasting so much time on trying to prove “I’m worthy” rather placing my faith in knowing my worthiness. Looking back I realized that I was insecure about feeling accepted and tried to overcompensate my self esteem by doing more than what’s required or even necessary for relationships and connection.
Bringing awareness to this pattern didn’t automatically stop, I had to actively intercept any reconfirming thoughts of that old pattern. That took a lot of work. At the time, My insecurities were my driving force, not my genuine desire for connection. That experience led me into more allowance and grace towards myself. And that’s where I discovered that faith is a sport that we must train and build up. And in order for me to believe, I had to be clear with my own intentions and how I was going to engage with it.
For me, and many others, faith was a struggle because I like to focus on hard facts and evidence. So much so, that if I did not see the tangibles, it was very difficult for me to trust in it or believe in myself to achieve it. In some ways that mindset served me well, however, it was also a stumbling block for living a more ease and stress reducing life. I constantly doubted myself and felt I needed to show up as the ideal rather than my authentic self expression. I was managing myself to be what my thought processes believed be and it was draining the life force out of me.
So how did I train to develop stronger faith? It started with me taking audit of my daily thought patterns. I use to suffer from terrible anxiety attacks, and what I found was many of the thoughts that triggered anxiety were not necessarily my own authentic thoughts. These were from other people or programs I picked up over the years that I had internalized as my own. It took me some time but everyday I would take notice of any thoughts that would trigger me emotionally and/or physically and was not in alignment with my desires outcome.
That simple mindset change led me to focus more on the feeling of what I was striving to accomplish rather than the monkey mind chaos of fear, doubt, and worry. It was a commitment to have a different experience with life. They say to have something you never had, you must do something you never done. And taking audit and account of my thoughts was what I never done before and it has warranted me some of my greatest lessons and experiences!
What is one step that you are going to take to build faith in your life? What areas of your life needs more awareness and compassion? I would love to hear from you in the comments section!