How to develop a sense of Agency and Maintain Your Control

Developing a sense of agency is vital for finding emotional , mental, spiritual, and physical balance, thinking more clearly and advocating for yourself.
My experiences has to taught and shown me the importance of this and I wish to share how I DID NOT have agency, to developing my own sense of agency.

To begin, having agency is your ownership of your own power and your ability to affect/create your future. It’s your ability to pilot your life.

I grew up in a very strict military, religious, and southern home. The old tale of children should be seen and not heard was the reigning value that my father held. In addition, I was raised or better yet talked down to by my “authority” that it is better to obey and if you do what you are told (obedience) then you will be rewarded with love, sustenance, and/or avoid being punished. Unfortunately there was nothing I could do or not do that was “good” enough to deserve provision or reward. I did not realize how that programming bled over into other areas of my life besides my desire to please and be loved by my parents, particularly my father. I adopted the notion that someone else was always in control of me and that I had no power to change or take ownership of myself. It wasn’t until I got married, had my second child, and entered my Saturn return that I started to see how my faulty belief system had hijacked my life, my creativity, and my power over myself. I have it all up to other people to decide what they felt was best for me, mainly out of what was best for their selves. I do not fault anyone who does and creates circumstances that is best for themself, in fact I encourage you to do the same. The problem was more so myself and not any one person, organization, or group; it was ALL me. I had to make the change in order to be for me what everyone was being for themselves, and that was having agency.

Below I share just the four principles that assisted me in developing and maintaining my agency.

  1. Intentions- this will always be number One! Setting an intent that you are committed to take action to change your circumstances, environment to change your life. It starts with your heart. Being true to what you want even when you do not have the words or idea of how to create it. This is where the mind can now play. When the mind attunes with the heart, the mind will make the shift because you have set a clear intent to be the pilot of your life, even when you don’t know HOW to do it. Just knowing you are committed will open the next step.
  2. Self Reflection and Control your stimuli- I’m always in a state of constant self reflection (a gift and blessing 😝) because it allows me to think about and evaluate my own motives, values and my life goals. This step is important because it allows you to address any conflicts in your motivations and choose acts and actions that are in favor with your values, goals, and motivations. This can come through journaling…I like making lists, or through quiet time alone…I typically like to record myself as I talk out my thoughts; I don’t always replay them because I’m quite judgmental but for the right reasons LOL. I have realized that when do listen to my old recordings I always gain new insights. This is a time to manage beliefs, emotions, discover new ideas, and enhance intuition.
  3. Education- This step is typically overlooked because we may think that only formal schooling is “education”. I would argue that any intent and act you take to learn something new is education. I love resource books, interviews, and documentaries. I’m a natural librarian (Libra/Aries) and love to study people, philosophy, and spiritual development. Sometimes it’s best to start with someone you admire or feel a sense of connection to so that you may learn about how they became who they are and how you can adapt their life lessons in your own life. My two favorite people thus far I have studied were Dolly Parton and Coco Chanel.
  4. Forethought and Strategy- NOW I BELEIVE THIS IS THE MOST SKIPPED STEP… but the most important as well. This is where you have to start figuring out the best way for you to get what and where you want to be. This step takes courage. The type of courage that Noah has whole building an Ark or like Daniel has when thrown into the Lions Den or like the Lion of The Wizard of Oz who helped save his friends when they were derailed and attacked. Courage is NOT the absence of Fear, in fact fear just may be necessary “block” that you are to go through to get what you KNOW you deserve.
    This is the phase of getting active mentally and physically, as well as spiritually.

Having agency is taking responsibility for YOUR life. It is the road least travelled because he requires discipline, paying attention, flexibility, and compassion for self and to self. As we practice agency, we will find that we have more influence not just over our own lives, but also in the lives of others. 😊💫

The Traps of New Age Spirituality

When comes to a spiritual journey, wisdom and knowledge is imperative in order to not be led astray. All leaders and guidance counselors should lead you back to you. What I have noticed within the spiritual or “new age” communities is the rise of “healers and teachers” converting back to religion or some form of monotheistic spiritual practice. While I have no issue with how one chooses to life out their path; I do take issue with how some come out as teachers or prophets of a spiritual system they have limited or no experience with.

To learn more on how to avoid New Age entrapment, click on the video

I Talked to my Vagina, and this happened… – Divinely Kissed

Just like many women, I had been conditioned to not know my feminine power. It was bottled up and served to me as the “perfect, obedient daughter, then as either the “we don’t love these thots/whores/sluts” or the “virginal ever-giving wife/mother” and then to matriculate as the “unacknowledged bitter old lady or ever-
— Read on

Getting to the BHAG

It’s Time To Design Your LIFE!

As you may know, everyone is obsessed with the BAG! Money bag Money Bag Money Bag Yo! Bag After Bag, Stopping Bags… its literally every where right now in Social Media and Popular Music/Culture!

There is a song that could be inserted <HERE> that relates to getting some type of BAG! While I am all about getting that Bag and Schmoney… not many are centering their points on what is needed to get the bag. Hence why I am focusing this and the next series on emails about Getting the #BHAG!

BHAG stands for Big Hairy Audacious Goal, an idea conceptualized in the book, “Built to Last: Successful Habits of Visionary Companies” by James Collins and Jerry Porras. According to Collins and Porras, a BHAG is a long-term goal that changes the very nature of a business’ existence. While this is an excellent read for business and entrepreneurs; I like to take this approach to our individual life. 

BHAGs are meant to shift how we do business,or in this matter, our life. BHAGs are bigger, bolder and more powerful than regular long- and short-term goals. They typically take a 10- to 30-year commitment, but they are exciting, tangible and something everyone just “gets” without any further explanation. For instance, may be your Big Hairy Audacious Goal is to move to another country; maybe its to go back to school as a single-parent non-traditional student; or maybe its just to connect with your body and senses in a way that you have never done before…. Whatever your BHAG is for you, I am here along the journey with you to share my BHAG and collaborate with you to get you to your BHAG!

So how do I start Getting to the BHAG you ask…

How to Create a BHAG

1. Conceptualize It

The first step is taking the time to think through and conceptualize a goal you can aim toward that will change your business and/or your life. Let go of constraints and let your imagination take charge; your BHAG should be overly ambitious and seem unattainable. Here are the other criteria of a BHAG to keep in mind:

  • Minimum of a 10-year plan
  • Action-oriented
  • Innovative
  • Compelling and exciting

This is probably the most difficult part of creating a BHAG. It can take a long time (weeks, months, even years) to identify a goal that is important enough to you to qualify it as a BHAG. However, I can assist you in finding your BHAG in a single session. My 2020 Gift to you a Consultation with me; email me back to get started!

Remember that a true BHAG is clear and compelling and serves as a unifying focal point of effort– often creating immense team and inner spirit.  It has a clear finish line, so that all involved can know when it has achieved the goal; we like to shoot for finish lines over here!  

Sure, 10 years seems like an awfully long time. But if you have created a powerful BHAG, a decade is probably an aggressive timeline. Personally, I kind of like the long time-frame. Think about how busy you are now. Having a goal that you don’t anticipate achieving until way in the future gives you time to create a solid plan and approach it methodically. And you’ll need that time if your BHAG is truly one of the “unattainable.”

Watch out for my Next email on the next step to Creating a BHAG!



What is Love, Spiritually?

It is February and Valentines Day is quickly approcahing. I could barely make it into 2020 without seeing the display of pink and red hearts prepping and reminding of the few short weeks until its time to profess your love for your significant other. I must admit, although I do not participate in many US Holidays, Valentines is one of my favorites. I am a Libra, so as a Venusian ruled sign, I love love and as a Leo Venusian, I LOVE the Glamour of Love! I love candle-lit dinners under the stars, lights dimmed low for a WHOLE Vibe, 90s R&B music, Chocolates, Balloons, Rom-Coms, Poetry, Italian cuisine, Gift exchanging, Classy Public display of affection, and Love-Making…

However, I know that none of that is love.

What is Love? It seems that so many of us are seeking it, longing for it, and even trying to avoid it. Despite your or mine disposition on love., one thing for sure it seems like a concept that many have heard yet truly may had or have. There are movies, songs, poetry, books all about love, lack of love, or the most relatable topic in music, unrequited love. It is literally everywhere and yet no where at the same time.

Alexa, play 21 Savage No heart

I have have been told that God is Love. I have even read about what it is supposed to be about in 1 Corinthians 13: 4-8

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

Love never fails.

But is this really what love is?

In this post I am going to explain what I BELIEVE love to be. AND that is just it, Love is Being. Love is an action not just a feeling or a doing. Love just is. Along my journey I think I have come to understand why in religious circles they say God is Love. I truly think that Love is so intangible that we use God (an unseemly intangible being) as a way to explain the un-explainable. I must preface it here that I do not BELIEVE in a God with out… meaning an entity outside of me or in the sky. I believe that God dwells inward. I believe that God is the very essence of why I have my existence. God is my energy or Inner Chi. Ques MaryMary God In Me..

Since God dwells within me, hence then I am God in the Flesh. The Word/The Sound/The Frequency that became Flesh. And in my spiritual journey I have come to understand that love is Self-Love and there is nothing higher or greater than that.

To love someone or anything else you must first love yourself. This is one of the biggest mistakes because many are looking for a god without (God is Love) instead of the God within. If you first do not love the Divine within you will never find, better yet attract love outward.

Love, in any form, starts with love for yourself.

Fill your cup up first, and give the overflow to others

Photo Credit: Nicky Deckoning

When you love yourself unconditionally, you fully accept and appreciate who you are, and you deeply respect and honour the truest version of yourself. You welcome a life of happiness and fundamentally believe you deserve to feel good about yourself. And when you come from this place of self-love, self-acceptance, self-compassion, and self-respect, you will have more fulfilling, loving relationships with others.

From my experience, Self love is the first experience of love. Love is Divine and when I began to Love me as the Divine; to simply put it, recognization and acknowledging of my own divinity opened me to love myself first, care for myself first, and put myself first so that I could be in a position to give and receive love unconditionally. Only because I give unconditional love to myself first, I am able to recognize the divinity of others and treat them accordingly based on their level or understanding of love without attachment or expectation.

God/is Love ❤️



Alchemy of Smudging with White Sage

White Sage smudging-the burning of sage- has become a staple in my spiritual practice. I was first introduced to the practice of smudging during a home and energy cleanse by my Yayi (traditional healer). I knew myself to be an empathetic or highly sensitive person, yet did not have the full understanding that I was attracting other people and my surrounding environment’s energy. Unbeknownst to me, I was holding on to other people’s negativity and toxicity and bringing them into my new home. There were times when I would feel sad, troubled, or down right negative and not know why until my Yayi suggested I start  energy cleanses. I am a Virgo South Node, so I am a natural skeptic of many things, however, I trusted my Yayi’s suggestion and decided to learn more about the practice and alleged benefits.

Despite being lauded and consistently practiced by indigenous cultures for thousands of years, smudging has been met by mixed reception within modern society. Native Americans, as well as diverse Asian cultures, believed (and continue to believe) that the smoke from sage and other herbs is capable of cleaning “negative energy,” whether it’s occupying a space or being carried by a person.

At first glance, this may sound like nothing more than a “woo-woo” concept, but it shouldn’t be dismissed too quickly. In this post I am sharing what I learned of smudging and how it has benefited me in my practice.

What are Ions

Ions are all around you right now and, whether you are aware of them or not, there is a good chance they are affecting the way you feel and quite possibly your health as well.

So what is an ion? An ion is a molecule that has lost or gained an electron through various atmospheric forces or environmental influences.

There are both positive and negative ions but, as we shall see, the definitions of ‘positive’ and ‘negative’ are misleading in terms of their health effects.

A simple definition of a positive ion is an electrically charged atom, or group of atoms, formed by the loss of one or more electrons. The number of protons does not change but the reduction in electrons gives the atom a positive charge.

Positive ions in the air are usually carbon dioxide molecules that have been stripped of an electron. Also known as positively charged ions or cations, they have been demonstrated to have a negative effect on your body when you are exposed to them in excess.

This is particularly the case with your lungs and respiratory tract but your immune system can also be affected. This is because positive ions are so small they are absorbed directly into your bloodstream from the air you breathe.

What Are Negative Ions?

The definition of a negative ion is an electrically charged atom, or cluster of atoms, formed by gaining one or more electrons. The number of protons in the atom does not change but the extra electrons gives it a negative charge.

Negatively charged ions, also known scientifically as anions, are the opposite of positive ions and they have directly the opposite effect on your health, mood and energy levels when you are exposed to them.

Negative ions in the air have a strong negative charge. Due to this nature, they are statically attracted to airborne particles like dust, mold spores, pet dander and other floating pollutants and potential allergens.

By attaching to these pollutants and allergens they give them a negative charge and, rather than drifting in the air, they are grounded and fall to the floor or nearest surface.

Even bacteria and viruses circling in the air of your home can be cleared by negatively charged ions attaching to them and removing them from the air your breathe.

Medical and scientific researchers do not use terms like “negative energy”, however, they are confirming the cleansing properties of smudging. A study published in the Journal of Ethnopharmacology demonstrated that the smoke from burning sage -what the authors of the study call “medicinal smoke”- is able “to completely eliminate diverse plant and human pathogenic bacteria of the air within confined space.[1]

From a scientific perspective, medicinal smoke is believed to release negative ions which bind to positively ionized particles like bacteria, viruses, mold spores, pet dander and other allergens, dust, and other hazardous particulates.  I would like to add here that indigenous cultures attempt to explain this negative ion phenomena through non-physical explanations that appeals to spiritual mythologies. I love myths and story-telling that can be tied or expounded upon by the facts of science.

The Scientific and Alchemical Benefit of Smudging

Kills Bacteria and Germs. The same study quoted above discusses the remarkable ability of sage as a tool for clearing bacteria and other pathogens from the respiratory tract and skin as a pulmonary and dermatological antimicrobial agent. For this reason, I smudge as a way to clear pathogens from the air in my home and surroundings.

Natural antidepressant. The negative ions present in medicinal smoke has another fascinating benefit: it balances mood and dispels depression (as well or better than pharmaceutical antidepressants, according to some data).[2]

A research engineer named Dr. Clarence Hansell first stumbled upon the benefits of negative ions in the 1930s. The negative-ion-charged air that some of his equipment produced led to such a dramatic mood boost in his coworkers that he decided to investigate further. A study in 1976 demonstrated that negative ions can balance levels of serotonin, which we now know has at least an indirect effect on the maintenance of mood and energy levels. The study cited above followed in the 1990s, and now negative ion therapy is finally gaining traction as a treatment modality for depression.

Improved sleep and performance. Due to its ability to modulate serotonin, the negative air ions (NAI) in smudging smoke provide a range of other benefits, as well. In 2013, a team of Italian researchers sought to delve deeper into the positive effects of NAI. Their analysis confirmed that NAI treatment works on par with antidepressants for mood disorders, and also observed that negative ions balance sleep patterns, promote restfulness, and improve physical performance.[3]

How do you cleanse your house with white sage?


I prefer to cleanse my home weekly on Sundays, which is also the day associated to Archangel Michael. I begin the day by cleaning the interior of my home. Upon completing the physical cleaning and organization of my home, I welcome Archangel Micheal and his healing and protective energy into my home, as well as a sense of gratitude for all that I have and soon to gain. I then proceed to burn the sage leaves, giving thanks to the leaves for her healing properties, to me, this act of gratitude is received by the spirit of the white sage as she discharges its energy of clearing and protection in the air around me and onto the items I intend to clear or cleanse. 

As the smoke transfers through the area or over an item, the smoke joins itself to any thick, negative energy that is inside the object, space or being. When the smoke is cleared, the spirit of this plant transports the negative energy back to the spiritual light, and leaves my space or the items cleared.

Immediately after clearing, I welcome the energy or frequency of Love, Discernment, Abundance, Joy, and whatever high vibration energy  to fill the spaces that were cleared. For me, this is the alchemical process of transferring a negative into neutral to a positive.

P.S. White sage is wonderful, but it’s not the only option when it Spiritual Cleansing Sessionscomes to smudging and energetically clearing your home! Cedar, wild sage, palo santo-another staple of mine-, juniper, sandalwood, and others are wonderful choices to cleanse, purify and raise the vibration of your home, objects, or even yourself!

Or if you don’t enjoy the smoke from sage smudging… Essential Oils are a wonderful way to cleanse and uplift the energy of your home as well!




Let’s Learn Tarot

Are you ready to enhance your intuitive power? Looking to Empower your Spiritual Gifts? Everything I teach on Devine Tribe Academy is designed to help you access your intuition, read Tarot with confidence, and create the life you want to live.

While many people believe that Tarot will tell you the future, making predictions are not really what Tarot cards are about.


If you are Ready to Tap into your Intuitive Inner Power and Manifest the Life You were Born to Live! Join Devine Tribe Academy today!!

To join the course click here

You Are Wombxxn

In society, we are taught from a young age to grow up and be the perfect woman. We are expected to do it all and if we can’t do it all, there is something wrong with us. We are taught that everything in the world is limited – finances, jobs, men, love, promotions, etc. We are told that sex is the only weapon we have to ensure we get what we want. We are told self-sacrifice is a noble act. We are told that a woman’s worth depends on who she marries, where she lives, the size of the rock on her finger, the children she bears, the car she drives, where she shops, the champagne she drinks, and of course, her dress size. We are taught the art of self-comparison – who’s the hottest, who’s the sexiest, who’s the smartest, who’s the thinnest – which slowly begins to chip away at our self-confidence.

We are taught the ways of powerlessness, not power.

As women we are learning to stand in our own power, not to dominate or control, but to be all of who we are. Authentic power is about cultivating your innate divine qualities that affirm your life, your identity and your well-being. It is all a Process, don’t fight against yours. Step into your High Value Femininity and attract, better yet flow into all that you desire

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